As discussed in the earlier post If you are a Manager/ Leader who is aspiring to develop a higher emotional intelligence, it is important to develop a rich emotional vocabulary.
You need to support your emotional growth by expanding your emotional vocabulary for communicating effectively.
In the last post, I discussed emotional and feelings words.
Our communication comprises words as well as phrases and sentences.
In this post, I will take you one step ahead.
I will be sharing the difference between positive and negative phrases with examples of each, the Impact of negative and positive phrases on the workplace environment, and physical and mental well-being and how they impact your relationships with others. and tips to communicate positively for higher emotional intelligence.
So let us begin!
WHAT ARE POSITIVE AND NEGATIVE PHRASES ?
A positive sentence or phrase is any affirmative /declarative or assertive phrase stating that a fact is so.
It is positive and shows the possibility of an action taking place without any hindrance.“
Eg – You look awesome in this dress.
Our New manager is very energetic.
A negative phrase or sentence indicates that some action is not happening or a person or thing does not possess a certain quality or something does not exist anymore or a statement that denotes refusal to do something or denial of something.
Eg– I cannot help Rob with his project work as I would be late.
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I am not in the mood to attend the meeting now.
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Janette should not have spoken to her Boss like that .
Effective communication means being able to turn any difficult conversation or challenging situation into a productive one.
And therefore for being able to communicate effectively, it is important to choose words and sentences that are inspiring, motivating, reassuring, and provide alternatives.
This will increase emotional intelligence in the workplace.
HERE ARE SOME BASIC DIFFERENCES BETWEEN NEGATIVE AND POSITIVE LANGUAGE .
Knowing the basic differences between Negative and Positive Language will help you choose the right language in any difficult situation and make it more easy .
Let’s look at these examples.
Negative Language Examples
This is too sophisticated.
I don’t think I was impressed by her presentation.
He is not doing the best he can.
On the whole the experience was not so unpleasant.
The U in Umbrella is never lowercase.
I’m not far from achieving my goal.
I made a big mistake.
Unless it is a bad weather , we will not cancel the event.
You don’t need to be there until 8 AM.
I’m awful at this.
Sorry I’ve been reserved .
Sorry that I fumbled .
The results I’ve got are not bad.
Sorry I’m late.
Positive Language Examples
I’ll deal with this from a new angle.
I was unimpressed with her presentation.
He can .He will do more .
The experience was somewhat pleasant.
The U in Umbrella is always uppercase.
I’m very close to achieving my goal.
What can I learn from this? How can I fix this?
If it is bad weather , we will cancel the event.
You need to be there by 8 AM.
I’m learning, it’s okay to be uncomfortable.
Thank you for being understanding.
Thank you for being patient when I made a mistake.
I’ve got some good/great results.
Thank you for waiting for me.
NEGATIVE LANGUAGE CHARACTERISTICS
Tells the recipient what not to do/cannot be done . |
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Doesn’t provide choices and alternatives to the recipient . |
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It can sound like bureaucratic ,blaming, shaming, or judging.It appears hostile and unengaging . |
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It’s passive, reactive , restricting and limiting .POSITIVE LANGUAGETells the recipient what to do / can be done |
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Provides choices and alternative paths to the recipient.It sounds helpful, encouraging ,reassuring, supportive, kind, empathetic.It generates more involvement as it sounds friendlyIt promotes positive action, is proactive , and encouraging |
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Having the differences between positive and negative language brought out , it would now like to shed some light on how Negative and Positive language Impacts the workplace . |
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Using positive or negative language in our everyday speech and thoughts defines the relationship we have with others, and it also affects the way we think and feel about ourselves.
HOW NEGATIVE LANGUAGE IMPACTS THE WORKPLACE ENVIRONMENT
Negative language is used by people who have a fixed mindset because they believe that not much can be done to improve their lives and broaden their abilities.
Such people are comfortable living in their comfort zone and resist change, because of the unknown and uncertain experiences that come with it.
Negative language as mentioned above is about disempowering, limiting beliefs and possibilities, disengaging, and demotivating.
It reflects ambiguity, uncertainty, and a lack of initiative. and therefore it harms the people around you.
Some of the negative results of negative language are :
1 More Conflicts–Organisations, where leaders and managers use negative language, frequently experience conflicts due to misunderstandings, and an atmosphere of tension, prevails there. The mood of the people is mostly down.
In such an environment, people blame each other instead of taking responsibility for a mistake. They are aggressive and the interactions are unpleasant.
People are not collaborative because they cannot see the bigger picture. Small issues escalate into bigger issues. If such problems are left unsolved, people lose sight of the big picture and do not enjoy their work.
2 Poor Engagement – Negative language also weakens the cohesion among team members and there is poor collaboration among them.
Due to high tension, people do not have the motivation and energy to finish tasks on time.
3 Poor Communication and Lower Productivity- People who use negative language, have communication problems. They are vague about roles and responsibilities and communicate information poorly.
As a result of this, there is chaos and delay in getting the work done within a given time frame and tension prevails in the team., there is a poor rapport and potential synergy in the team.
4. Poor Relationships in the workplace – Using negative language, the examples of which you have read above, conveys a lack of trust in others.
It is demotivating and brings others down and people avoid interacting with such people who use limiting language.
These people have poor relationships with those around them because there are frequent misunderstandings and conflicts between them and others.
Others do not feel relaxed and confident in their presence.
HOW POSITIVE LANGUAGE IMPACTS THE WORKPLACE ENVIRONMENT
Positive language is used by people who have a growth mindset. They believe that anything is possible if you work hard enough and have a clear idea about what to do.
Positive language is informative, proactive, and helpful. It helps give you motivation, positive self-perception, and character strength and helps you to see yourself in a more empowering and inspiring light .
Positive language communicates determination, pro-action, and self-confidence. it reflects your intentions, enthusiasm, and eagerness to solve a certain problem.
Negative language reflects a negative attitude and mood, whereas positive language communicates a supportive, confident, and cheerful attitude.
Here are some benefits of using positive language in the workplace.
1 . Improved mood and well-being
Positive language elevates our mood and well-being because our thoughts and emotions are influenced by our language.
Positive language is empowering, inspiring, and motivating. It helps others around you to think positively and helps in achieving organizational goals faster.
2. Better Rapport and Cohesion in the team
Uplifting language leads to a joyful and friendly atmosphere and brightens the mood of the employees. There is better rapport, synergy, and cohesion in the team.
3. Positive Self Image
Using positive language about your personality and abilities portrays you in a positive light. It is empowering, and inspiring to others around you.
Positive language is about things you can do, your strengths, and unlimited potential. It creates a positive image of you in others’ minds.
4 An Inspiring Role Model
Leaders and Managers who use positive language in their day-to-day communication become inspiring role models for their teams.
Such people can use their positive thinking and work hard to achieve their dreams because they create a friendly atmosphere and brightness around them.
Positive language uplifts motivate and excite people to do their best.
5 A Positive Workplace Environment
In workplaces where Leaders and Managers use positive language, there is a better relationship between colleagues, alignment with company goals, a high-performing team, and better communication between employers and employees.
Positive language generates a positive environment.
A person using negative language will use phrases like – “I’m unsure…”, “Well, I wouldn’t do this and that…”, “I might retaliate …”
A person who uses positive language will say “I know/I will figure out a solution to this problem”, and “If you can give me a day I will look into this…”
So you can see the difference between both and the impact it will have on the workplace environment.
6.Improved Relationship with Employees
As a leader or Manager, your team members look up to you as a role model. They model your behavior. Using negative phrases like ‘’ Don’t do this, ‘’ ‘’ You can’t do that ‘’ ‘’ This is not how it is done ‘’are demotivating, and limiting and lead to confusion and frustration.
Positive language makes them feel more enthusiastic, motivated, responsible, valued, and confident.
As a result, they are eager to take on more responsibilities.
To increase Emotional Intelligence in the workplace and be an Effective Leader /Manager, it is important to use positive language while communicating, or resolving conflicts.
Positive language is essential for understanding, connecting, motivating, and engaging with the staff.
Positive language minimizes tensions and conflicts and uplifts the mood and productivity of the employees.
And now to the final point of this post, How to communicate positively for Higher Emotional Intelligence.
TIPS TO COMMUNICATE POSITIVELY FOR HIGHER EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE
Now that you have understood what negative and positive language is and how it impacts the tone of your conversation and creates a negative or positive impact on the recipient, it’s time to learn some tips to communicate positively so that you can apply them in real life situations and create more positivity in the workplace and make a positive impact on the minds and emotions of those around .
Using Positive language is all about taking an active role in the conversation. It’s focusing on the good things — the things that can be possibly done to solve problems.
Here are some valuable Tips you can implement right away :
1 Avoid Using Negative words: Negative Words like-can’t, won’t, mustn’t, unable, hard, however, No, Yeah, and Difficult must be avoided at all costs.
They limit the possibilities and options. They are vague, and ambiguous, and communicate a lack of initiative and uncertainty. They convey dismissiveness and lack of acceptance. People lose faith in you.
2.Reframe phrases that have negative words like “can’t”, “won’t”, “don’t”, “stop”, and “shouldn’t” and also those starting with negative prefixes such as -un, -in, ( (inconvenient, unpleasant, incompetent, irresponsible, etc).
They create disengagement from the beginning.
For example, if you want to say that something can’t be done, then instead of apologizing, offer an alternative. This will help the conversation move forward and create a solution-oriented environment.
3. Use positive words: Words like ‘’awesome ‘’, ‘’great’’,’’ brilliant ‘’,’’ wow’’ are positive . They uplift people immediately because the other person finds himself accepted, acknowledged, and appreciated.
They show determination, confidence, and clarity and breed trust.
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With practice, you will find that your mind and body rewiring for positivity and you will experience more positive outcomes, better relationships, and more peace and happiness in your workplace.
CONCLUSION
As I promised at the beginning of the post that I will be sharing the difference and impact of both positive and negative language and its role in improving emotional intelligence in the workplace and sharing some important tips for effective communication.
I am sure you have found value in the post.
Using positive language is one important aspect of higher emotional intelligence.
As a Manger /Leader, you will be able to accomplish your goal faster, create a friendly and supportive environment in the workplace, and build a strong cohesive team that is well-engaged and high performing.
You will earn more respect, experience more peace and happiness and get more support from your team.
So be intentional about using positive language.
And to deepen your knowledge further , here are some Valuable and Interesting posts that you can refer to improve your emotional vocabulary for Higher Emotional Intelligence .
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Read them Here :
https://www.inc.com/bill-murphy-jr/people-who-use-these-5-toxic-phrases-at-work-have-very-low-emotional-intelligence.html
https://www.inc.com/bill-murphy-jr/people-who-use-these-5-toxic-phrases-have-very-low-emotional-intelligence.html
https://www.inc.com/bill-murphy-jr/people-who-use-these-3-toxic-phrases-have-very-low-emotional-intelligence.html
https://www.inc.com/bill-murphy-jr/people-who-use-these-3-toxic-phrases-have-very-low-emotional-intelligence_1.html
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